No Going Home Again

I’ve mentioned before that I never really liked fanfic. I understand why people write it – sometimes it’s to explore part of a story that the author didn’t get to. Sometimes it’s for pervy (read: slash) related reasons. Sometimes it’s characters from a game or a show as opposed to a book and there’s such a love and longing for more about those characters that the writer has to just get it out. Sometimes it’s just arrogance or masturbatory vanity – the idea that fanfic could be written better than what the original author had done.

All sorts of reasons, really. I’ve never been fond of it because in my mind it’s not canon (even if it’s well written and not just some self-inserted fangirly thing). Maybe an odd thing to think about for fictional characters, but if the author didn’t write it, then it didn’t happen. End of story.

There’s something awesome about longing for more and knowing you’ll never get it. It’s bittersweet too, when that story or series comes to an end, even if it’s not quite the end you were hoping for. This morning I read a review of the forthcoming Anne Bishop book “Twilight’s Dawn” over at Dear Author. I’m linking, but be aware there’s some pretty deep spoilers.

I read them, because I can’t NOT know, even though it won’t be out until March.

Needless to say, I was a little bit disappointed to hear how things are going to work out. I’m going to read it, of course, but there are quite a few comments and recommendations not to read it at all, because it will ruin the series. And as a whole, the books have been a bit up and down for me, particularly the last few. Funny how those first three hold such a chunk of my heart, though. (For quite a number of reasons.) And even though I’m not a huge proponent of the HEA for books sometimes, there’s still something comforting about knowing that certain characters ride off into the sunset together (or whatever metaphor applies.) Even if we don’t get anymore stories about them, we imagine them safe and happy and doing their thing forever and ever and ever. (Hence people saying they won’t read this book – mostly because it completely shreds that illusion. It’s uncomfortable.)

I need to know how it all ends, even if it’s emotionally devastating. I need to know WHY things end the way they do. But it’s a hard pill to swallow, I guess and some part of me will probably mourn for the stories that won’t be written as a result..

And no, I won’t be dabbling into fanfic, even to soothe my heart. After all, it’s not my story to tell.

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