There’s something about starting a new book that freaks me out. For all that I’m a bit of a clutter-cat in general, I sometimes have a hard time actually putting those first words on the page.
Maybe it’s that internal fear that I will screw it up before it even begins. Something about all that potential. It’s hard for me to commit to those feckless words. Maybe I don’t trust my own in instincts as well as I should.
But still, eventually I take the plunge and go for it. I have an outline for Book 3 that I had to write, but I haven’t looked at it since I handed it in to my editor. I don’t like working off of anything if I can help it. I’ve got a vague idea of where I’m going and that usually works for me when I’m starting out. In some ways I’m almost flirting with the concepts and trying to find which line is going to get the story to come back to my place for a little bit of action. (Which sounds delightful, but half the time I get him in my bedroom and discover that the story’s idea of a good time involves a blow torch and a headless Barbie doll. Probably explains a lot. >_< )
So I finally swung past the 10k mark over the weekend. Things are going a little slower this time around than I would like, but I’m being consistent for the most part and it’s nice to see that things are starting to take shape. The foundation of this book is a little different than the others so far, but that’s not a bad thing. (I will have to go back and fill in some of the cracks, but that’s pretty typical anyway.) But rounding that 10k mark is a bit of a relief – it tells my brain that this is, in fact, the beginnings of a novel and forces it to take a closer look at the writing. I’ve found that if the story isn’t there for me, regardless of the quality of the words, I’ll start to look for ways to avoid it. (Gee, who do we know in BoD who is like this??)
But if the story starts to take on a life of its own, well, then the pull to find out what happens next starts tickling the back of my head in the evenings and that is what forces me to sit down and actually do it.
I’ll take the motivation however it comes.