To Sweet Beginnings and Bitter Endings

I guess this is the part where I breathe a sigh of relief. Or maybe I get depressed because it’s over?

Yes, that is a shot of the pages before I mailed them out. Yes, I am questioning why douche bags is listed as two words, when it should be one. These are the things that make my world turn, obviously.

It’s a bit odd knowing that for all intents and purposes, my book contract is officially over.

I mailed those first pass pages off this morning and as of now, I’m done. (Yes, there’s all the promo stuff to do – the swag to hand out, the guest blogs and the cons, but the contract itself is filled.) And yes, it is bittersweet.

Reading through those pages one last time and correcting the small things, I can’t help but wonder if I could have done things differently. Or if I should have. Could I have made the story longer? Maybe.

The practical side of me decided I needed to stick within the realms of the books I’d been given, though maybe that showed a certain lack of confidence. Or maybe it was smart. I honestly don’t know, and I probably never will.

Will fans be happy at the way things turn out for Abby and gang? I hope so, though I know there will be disappointment from some corners. Can’t help that, really. And things are wrapped up enough…but not entirely. There’s fudge room, should I get a chance to revisit. There’s plenty of opportunity for growth for many of the other characters, and I wouldn’t mind getting a chance to explore their stories either. (Or coming back to Abby at some point…you never know.)

There is something freeing about no longer having a deadline hanging over my head. But it’s also sorta scary. For the last 3 years, all I’ve done is written Abby. (Would I have like to have written other things? Sure. But I’m just not that fast.) I’ve been trying to write some new stuff, but I suspect I’m going to scrap most of what I’ve done and start over again. It’s a personal mental block, but I’m just not happy with what I’ve got. Maybe not having deadlines will be a good thing.

Maybe it will be a disaster.

Guess I’ll find out.

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